Sunday, October 27, 2013

I want to remember ...

... so, I was sitting here.  thinking so many thoughts.  then I'd think, "oh, should I blog that".  hmmm.

honestly, there is SO much on my mind, I feel like I can't truly begin.  anyone who actually reads this blog (and kids, some day you'll read it in book form) should be prepared for, possibly, some very random and most likely very "long winded" posts!!

... anyway, I was thinking about the blog and how I'm so excited to be getting back into blogging.  admittedly, I have some guilt for the many months that aren't documented on here ... then I remembered something.  it needed to be the way it was.

blogging had somehow gone from something I loved and something I treasured, to a chore.  it wasn't fun, it was something I had to do.  I mean, I can't have adult children that don't have every minute of their lives documented, can I?  it's kind of like the way I hold on to some of their baby clothes, toys, art work, etc. - how can they survive as adults if they don't have all these things?

then it sort of hit me: they can.

plenty of people in this world don't have any such treasures from their childhood.  maybe they care, maybe they don't.  I have (in existence, if not in my possession) many treasures from my childhood - maybe that's why I'm so sentimental when it comes to my kids having these same sort of items.  there are photos of me, baby clothes, baby shoes, art work, school projects, tae kwon do belts & broken boards, sticker books, doll clothes - I even still have some of my toys and my parents still have my bike!

the thing is, we live very different lives.  we're a military family and we move every few years - I, on the other hand, grew from 2 to 20 in the same home.  we have four children - I, on the other hand, was essentially an only child.  so, that's another thing I have had to realize - things are different for us.

now, to my point. 

when I really felt that the blog was becoming a burden, I decided to do something radical: let it go.

it was never meant to be permanent, I think I always knew I'd return to my blog - it is, after all - as I've stated many times, our scrapbook.  literally the only documentation I have of our life as a family.  ok, there's facebook and instagram - but those don't count.

I just needed a break.  I wanted to live in the moment with my kids.  I wanted to do fun stuff and not have to then sit on the computer for an hour blogging about it.  there are still photos - I don't think I could ever stop being "photographer" - however, often times I even backed off of that ... once again, to be in the moment and enjoy it!!!  pretty much anyone who follows my blog is also a facebook friend and/or follows me on instagram ... so the photos from our fun times & our every day stuff haven't been completely lost. 

and now, that time is behind me.  I feel refreshed and I miss blogging and I'm excited to "be back"!  I feel excited that I have this for myself and my kids.  I feel excited that we have this new beautiful home and our future is looking so bright.  we have conquered many hurdles the past few years and I praise the Lord for getting us through all the hard stuff.  now it's time to truly get on track & live life to the fullest ... and blog along the way!

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